


I'm Your Biggest Fan!

by Mattricole



Category: RWBY
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Comedy, F/F, Minor Violence, Romance, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-08-11
Packaged: 2018-12-08 21:48:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11655378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mattricole/pseuds/Mattricole
Summary: With the arrival of the zombie apocalypse, Weiss thought her only problems would be dealing with zombies and crazy, self-absorbed survivors. She never expected her third problem, the annoying fangirl Ruby Rose.





	1. Chapter 1

“Just a bit more, Weiss. Just a bit more,” she muttered to herself, sitting uncomfortably in an abandoned video store in some no name small town, a dead rat by her feet as she finally managed to start a fire. She sighed, unsure if she should be relieved or disgusted, she stabbed the rat with a sharp stick and held it in front of the fire, slowly cooking the foul smelling rodent.

It didn’t matter how important survival was to her, Weiss knew she would never get used to the smell of cooked rat. Just looking at it filled her with utter disgust, and she wasn’t entirely sure if eating this would be better than just starving to death.

‘Maybe I’d be better off just getting eaten,’ she thought to herself, the thought of returning to her father never occurring to her. She’d rather eat a hundred living rats than go back to that prison. “Speaking of rats,” she muttered, pinching the rat meat between her fingers, easily ripping it from the corpse. The blasted thing was fully cooked, though she was tempted to cook it longer. The taste of burnt meat was almost more appealing than eating a well done rat.

With a distasteful grunt she quickly shoved the meat into her mouth, swallowing quickly as to keep tasting the dreadful thing to a minimum. This was how she spent her entire meal, silently sitting in front of a tiny flame and shoving rat meat into her mouth, oh how the mighty have fallen. She used to be a star! People would travel across the globe to listen to her sing, to gaze upon her splendid form as she stood on stage, entrancing her audience with stories of failed romance, bitter angst, and finally hope for a better future!

And now, much to her chagrin, she lived much like a jobless hobo, nothing but a rapier and revolver to defend herself against an undead horde that wanted nothing more than to devour her whole.

‘Huh, thinking of it like that makes it seem like they’re part of my overzealous fanboys,’ Weiss thought with a grin, thinking of it like that made it a bit easier dispatching the once living humans, she’d have to keep that in mind when next she meet one of the ravenous brutes.

By the time she had finished her meal the sun had set, her fire having gone out with it. The thought of gathering more firewood quickly dashed from her mind, that would only attract unwanted attraction. If it didn’t attract zombies it would gather the attention of other survivors, survivors that would most likely kill her for her limited supplies. That wasn’t a situation she wanted to be a part of.

She poured a bit of dirty water over where her fire used to be, quickly patting it to see if it was cold. She didn’t want to be burned if the fire somehow blazed back to life. It was unlikely, but she learned day one of the outbreak that it was better to be safe than sorry.

The outbreak. If anyone knew how this started they sure as hell didn’t tell anyone. Weiss herself was in the middle of a concert the day it started, her concert being overrun by the undead horde and quickly turning her fans against her. The only reason she survived was because she had brought along her rapier, Myrtenaster, to practice her fencing forms, and a revolver she found on the body of one of the few zombies she managed to kill.

She was quickly picked up by her father. Thinking fast he quickly took her back to the estate, a mansion made to resemble a castle in the middle of the capital of Atlas. It was there where he began to go slowly insane.

It started small and inconspicuously, he gathered as many survivors as he could and kept inside the mansion, only leaving when they had to. This actually caused her to respect the man, who she thought only cared for himself.

It then went from zero to a hundred, with those he deemed weak were murdered and had their bodies ground up for meat. Weiss was unsure when this happened and feared that she had unwittingly ate another human being. After she had learned of this she quickly packed up her rapier, revolver, as much ammo as she could find, and any other supplies she could carry with her and still keep a steady pace.

Two years ago she had escaped that place, making her way to Vale on one of her families many abandoned yachts. In a bout of generosity she left the supplies on the yacht, hoping any other survivors would find it and use it wisely.

She never did find out what happened to Winter, her father all but abandoning her older sister. Oh, how she would love nothing more than to find her, and given that it was Winter, Weiss had the feeling she was still alive out there, somewhere.

‘Maybe she’s leading a military resistance,’ she thought tiredly, a yawn escaping from her lips as she stretched out her limbs, hiding herself within some debris that had collapsed from a nearby building. Oh how she wished she had companions to watch her back, preferably Winter, who she could take turns with to take up watch in case of danger.

‘Yeah, that’s what we’ll do when we find each other,’ she thought to herself, her eyelids growing heavy as the gentle whistling of the wind lulled her to sleep.

\---LineBreak---

The images of better days flashed in Weiss’ mind, days spent with her beloved sister dancing in the back of her mind as grunts and growls stole away any bliss that those dreams would have bestowed to her. Irritation flashed in her mind, wanting nothing more to yell at the dastards who would dare interrupt her pleasant dreams, before it was quickly replaced with panic.

Her heart froze along with her body, forcing herself to breath steadily as she slowly opened her eyes. Nothing, nothing but the empty building was before her. 

‘Good,’ she thought to herself, rising into a kneeling position as she grabbed her rapier in her left hand, her right holding her revolver. She strained her ears, the muffled sounds of grunts and growls quietly entering into her ears. Zombies? Or survivors looking for others to kill and loot? She was unsure which one would be worse, either way there was a good chance for a fate worse than death.

She breathed in slowly through her nose, holding it for a moment or two before exhaling through her nose. She could do this, she could get out of this alive. Keep calm, keep rational, keep the upper hand. If worse comes to worse and she couldn’t escape or kill her potential enemy, put a bullet in her brain. If she had to die, she would make sure it was quick and painless, a bit cowardly but hey, there wasn’t exactly a lot of people out there nowadays that could judge her without being a hypocrite. With that thought in mind she quietly made her way towards the voices. 

“That’s right, little red. Nice and quick,” she heard someone say, their voice filled with desire underlying with a threat. “Come on, you don’t want anything to happen to this lil pupper, do you?”

‘Little pupper?’ confusion, along with a bit of disgust, began filling Weiss. What the hell was going on?

“I get it, I get it!” a voice of a young girl yelled, panic evident in her voice. “Just...oh god just please don’t hurt him,” her voice trembled, before a loud, painful yip resounded throughout the area. “Zwei!”

“Don’t even think about it!” the cruel voice said along with the sound of a gun cocking. “You don’t wanna see your mutt hurt? Then hurry up with losing the clothes, I wanna savor this moment.”

Weiss gritted her teeth as she heard the soft sobbing of the girl she couldn’t even see. She knew she shouldn’t get involved, just use the girl as a distraction and high tail it out of there. But she couldn’t, her legs refused to move in the opposite direction, instead taking her around, making a their way slowly around the wall, directly behind the cocky bastard.

She didn’t know who this girl was, and quite frankly she couldn’t bring herself to care. This girl was clearly willing to sacrifice her own well being just to save the life of her dog, to suffer through the pain and humiliation of whatever the dastard had planned for her. As much as Weiss wanted to leave, she just couldn’t abandon someone so loyal to their companion, even if that companion, no, especially if that companion was a dog! 

Weiss had finally made her way around behind the dastard. She stared at the girl in front of him, a brunette with red dyed tips, she couldn’t make out her eyes as her head was down in shame as she began peeling off her corset, her breast jiggling underneath her white blouse, causing Weiss to involuntarily drool, though she quickly snapped herself out of it. She could ogle the adorable brunette later.

“That’s right, keep going.” Weiss turned back towards the dastard, a man dressed in rags with a knife in one hand and an adorable corgi in his other. The dog was in his right, held to his side and not his front. She could stab him straight through the heart and wouldn’t endanger the dog, all he had to do was-

“I said keep going!” he shouted, pointing his knife at the brunette.

‘Perfect,’ Weiss thought as she rushed forward.

“That’s it, bitch, that’s ri-AARGH!” he screamed, looking down at the blade now protruding from his chest. The brunette looked up, confusion on her face.

“What the heck does that-Oh my god!” she shouted, shocked as the man fell to the ground, releasing Zwei, who quickly rushed towards her. “Oh my god, Zwei! Did you do that?!” she asked, staring back and forth between the dog and the dead man.

“...Seriously?” Weiss muttered, her opinion on the girl already negative as she began walking towards the girl, wiping away the blood from her sword with a piece of cloth. “No, you idiot, I’m the one who-”

“Oh! My! God!” the brunette stood quickly, corgi in one hand and cheek in the other. “You! You! You!You!You!You!Me!Me!Me!I-I-I” she shouted, a smile from ear to ear as she jumped up and down like a giddy school girl.

“Uh...what about you?” Weiss muttered, slowly backing away from the overly excited girl, fear suddenly gripping her heart. ‘Oh god, please don’t tell me she’s-’ her thoughts were interrupted as the girl quickly rushed towards her, squishing both her and Zwei in a bone breaking hug.

“I’m your biggest fan!”

“Of course you are,” Weiss muttered, frustrated that even in a zombie apocalypse she just couldn’t escape her crazy, annoying fans.


	2. Chapter 2

“And we’ll have a sleepover, and we can eat snacks together, and we can paint Zwei’s nails together, well no, we can’t ‘cause I don’t have any nail polish, but if we did have nail polish-”

All Weiss could do was grimace and nod as Ruby led her away towards her camp a mile off. Apparently Ruby was scouting around looking for food when that dastard took hostage of her dog, Zwei. Under any normal circumstance Weiss would have quickly abandoned the girl after saving her, having extreme difficulties dealing with her motor mouth. Sadly, the zombie apocalypse was not a normal circumstance and she had to take what she could get.

‘If this Ruby Rose is the only person I can have a positive human relationship with, then dammit I’m going to take it,’ she repeated to herself, over and over to help quell her annoyance with the girl. The only two positives she could think of were the fact that the girl was extremely cute and she had an equally cute doggie.

“And we can- And we can- And we can- A-a- Oh my god,” Ruby muttered, turning away from Weiss. “I’m hanging out with THE Weiss Schnee!” the girl squealed in excitement.

“Is it really that big of a deal?” Weiss asked, causing Ruby to quickly turn back to her.

“Is it a big deal?! Of course it’s a big deal!” Ruby shouted, getting down on one knee and striking a pose. “Do you know how long I’ve waited for? Doo bee doo!” and promptly started singing. “To meet my idol and...something something…drinking milkshakes! Daa Dee Daa!”

“Uh, right. Got it, you can stop now-” But no one listened.

“To take her hand, in my own and show her how I feeeeel?” Ruby promptly stood, arms above her head and flashing a dazzling smile.

“...You done yet?” it sounded more of a beg than a question.

“I got a- Story to tell ya, of a young girl watching MTV-”

“Okay, you’re done!” Weiss interrupted, grabbing onto Ruby’s ear and began pulling with all her might. 

“Sorry sorry sorry!” Ruby squeaked, struggling out of Weiss’ grasp. “Owie, did you have to pull so hard?” she asked, trying to rub away the burning feeling in her ear.

“I didn’t have to, but you didn’t have to sing and dance either,” Weiss shot back, earning her first glare from the fangirl.

“Heh, you may not like the idea of singing with me, but mark my words, Schnee,” Ruby muttered, the darkness of her tone catching Weiss off guard. Ruby slowly walked up to Weiss, wrapping her arms around Weiss and bringing her mouth against Weiss’ ear. “We will sing and dance together, and you’ll be like, ‘Wow, Ruby! I really enjoy singing and dancing with you!’, and then Zwei will ride a unicycle,” Ruby whispered gently, causing Weiss to almost let out a chuckle.

“You really think you can teach your dog how to ride a unicycle?” The idea was actually quite appealing to Weiss, nothing could be more adorable than that.

“We’d have to find one with pedals close enough to the seat, but sure, why not?” Ruby asked as she backed away, bouncing up and down on her heels with a smile. “Now come on, the others shouldn’t be too far off!” Ruby said as she bounced off in another direction, quickly being followed by Zwei.

“And who are the others?” Weiss asked as she jogged up next to Ruby.

“It’s-” the sound of a shotgun going off interrupted Ruby, causing both girls to look in the direction from whence it came. In front of them stood a blonde woman, holding up the shotgun into the air with dramatic flair. The girl lowered her shotgun, before leveling a stare at Weiss, a toothpick in her mouth being chewed on dramatically.

“Her sister,” she finished, a smirk on her lips and a hand on her hip.

“...Did you seriously waste a shotgun shell just to look cool?” 

“-and my sister’s BFF! Hi, Blake!” Ruby called out with a wave.

“Hello, Ruby,” a small smile made it’s way to Blake’s face, before disappearing as she stared at Weiss. “Is that? No, it can’t be-”

“Oh, and my sister’s name is Yang, but that’s not really important.”

“Hey, what’s that suppose to-”

“Uh, sorry to interrupt, but don’t you think-” Weiss began before getting hit with a ball of bread, causing her to quickly glare up at Yang. “Did you seriously just threw a ball of bread at me?” she whispered, clenching her teeth in order to stop herself from yelling. They were already making too much-

“Okay, guys, seriously! Did you have to ruin my dramatic entrance? As soon as I saw Ruby with lil hottie over there, I came up with an amazingly-”

“Stupid idea that wasted a shotgun shell,” Blake chided, staring at Yang with a sense of disappointment. “I expected better from-”

“Yeah, bickering and standing around like idiots sounds great and all!” Weiss interrupted, earning a glare from Yang and the attention of everyone else. “But don’t you think shooting that off would alert-”

As soon as she had spoken, moans began erupting around the area around them, the sounds of shuffling feet going off around them, as if they were surrounded by it. Weiss sighed at the sound, glaring at the now chuckling Yang.

“Whoops! Guess I shouldn’t have done that. You could say that I was zomBEING an idiot-”

“Oh my god, this is how I’m going to die,” Weiss muttered, slapping her own face in exasperation, Blake casting a look at the girl that seemed awfully close to pity. ‘She’s looking at me as if this is a normal occurrence for- Oh god it is. It is and I’m going to die.’ It was at this moment Weiss had resigned herself to her fate.

“Don’t worry, Weiss!” Ruby said as she picked up Zwei in one hand and took Weiss’ hand in the other. “Just keep running and we’ll be-” 

“GRAGH!” a zombie screamed as it popped out of a nearby car, causing Ruby to screech.

“Run run run!” she shouted, running off with Weiss and Zwei before being quickly followed by Yang and Blake.

‘Yup, this is definitely how I die,’ Weiss thought to herself, pumping her legs with all her might, refusing to look behind at the undead horde that was quickly gaining on them.

“Look on the bright side!” Yang called as she ran next to Weiss. “Maybe they’ll stop chasing us when they’re DEAD tired!” 

The zombies weren’t the only ones to groan at her pun.


	3. Chapter 3

“I-I’m alive,” Weiss muttered, smiling as she tried to catch her breath. 

“Not much stamina, eh?” Yang said, her breathing was a bit faster from before, but it was clear she could keep going for awhile yet. “You know, I can...help you with that, if you want,” she said, wrapping her arm around Weiss’ shoulder.

“No thanks,” Weiss muttered, pulling herself away from Yang. “And this is where we part ways!” Weiss said with a huff as she began walking away from the three, much to Ruby’s surprise.

“What?! But-but why?!” she shouted, running in front of Weiss to prevent her from leaving. “We have food, shelter-”

“We have two cans of beans and a small tent,” Blake interrupted, earning a glare from Ruby.

“Blake, I’m trying to get her to stay-”

“You have a tent?” Weiss asked, quickly turning back to Blake.

“A small tent, but if you stay and help out, I don’t mind sharing,” Blake said with a shrug, not caring one way or the other.

“It’ll be nice, we could always use another person to help share some...body heat,” Yang whispered the last part, licking her lips as she looked Weiss up and down. 

“...I’ll make sure to sleep between you and Yang,” Ruby offered, glaring at her sister. “I’ll make sure she won’t touch you.”

“...I think I’d prefer to sleep next to Blake,” Weiss said, backing away from Ruby and towards Blake, who seemed the most sensible of the group. “And as for food,” Weiss muttered, sliding off her duffle bag and opening it for all to see. “I have a jar of peanut butter,”

“Zwei will love that,” Yang muttered, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively, grunting as Blake drived her elbow into her stomach.

“...You make me sick,” Weiss muttered, casting a glare at Yang before turning back to her provisions. “A box of crackers and a can of tuna-”

“Tuna!” Blake shouted, rushing towards Weiss and peering into the duffle bag. “Did you say-It is!” she shouted, taking the can of tuna, smiling like a child in the candy store.

“Uh, can I have that-” she reached out, only to have her hand swatted away.

“Hiss!” Blake let out an animalistic sound as she scurried away underneath a nearby car, glaring at Weiss as she tried to peel off the lid.

“...Ruby?” 

“What’s up, Weiss?” she asked innocently, much too close for Weiss’ comfort.

“I think I will sleep next to you after all,” Weiss said, having lost all faith in Blake. 

“Ooh, I can’t wait! Oh, I hope you don’t mind, but is it okay for Zwei to cuddle up next to you? Blake’s not too fond of him and-”

“It’s fine,” Weiss cut her off, secretly happy that she got to cuddle with the corgi. Sure, these three idiots would probably get her killed, but at least she could have a nice, comfy tent to sleep in while cuddling with a corgi. Now all she had to hope for was Ruby not to be the cuddling type.

\---LineBreak---

Weiss’ hope was dashed away as she felt Ruby against her back, her arm draped over her body protectively, Ruby’s head buried into the back of her neck. Weiss was also fairly certain that she detected Ruby kissing the back of her neck as well, which she would normally have called the young girl out on if it weren’t for one thing.

She liked it. Oh, how she enjoyed the feeling of being wrapped up in Ruby’s arms, their legs tangled together like two lovers after a night of unbridled love making. The way she could feel Ruby’s contented breathing down the back of her neck, sending shivers down her spine.

In order to not be completely overwhelmed from Ruby’s cuddling Weiss decided to do her best on concentrating on Zwei, gently petting him and scratching his ear. She did her best not to wake him, and by the way, he was unconsciously cuddling closer to her made her positive her gentle massages was doing more good than harm.

‘This isn’t so bad,’ Weiss thought to herself, easily seeing herself getting comfortable in this situation. Though Ruby was a little...overwhelming at times, she did have a good heart. A bit air headed, from what she could tell, but she was much better than a majority of other survivors. Perhaps she was being a bit harsh on the girl on the fact she was a fan of her work? Thinking like that made Weiss regret how she treated the girl a bit coldly, just because she reminded her of her overzealous fans didn’t mean she should treat her like one.

Blake wasn’t so bad either, in fact, the only problem was her obsession over tuna, and if she ignored that then Blake was the perfect person to be with in the middle of the zombie apocalypse.

Yang was...something. Honestly, as of now, Weiss saw nothing positive in the idiotic brute. All she knew was that she was Ruby’s sister and that she was reckless. If they were going to survive she would need to mature just a bit. There was one thing nice about her though…

“Weiss,” as if on cue, Yang entered the tent, whispering her name.

“My turn already?” she asked, earning a nod from Yang. Yang had offered Weiss the last turn for keeping watch, allowing her to sleep uninterrupted for six hours. Weiss had gladly taken it, though she only managed to sleep on and off throughout the night, thanks to Ruby.

“If you’re too tired or...enjoying yourself,” she smiled at the sight of her tangled up in Ruby’s limbs. “I can take your watch for you.”

“No thanks, I’ll be fine,” Weiss whispered, back, slowly untangling herself from Ruby. “I was getting a little hot from Ruby anyways.”

“Oh, is that so?” Yang smiled, earning a blushing glare from Weiss.

“You know that’s not what I mean,” she whispered harshly. It didn’t have the desired effect as Yang simply laughed her off.

“Here’s the watch, make sure you wake me in two hours so I can start on breakfast.” And with that Yang quickly took her place next to Ruby, who sighed in content at the new cuddle partner.

‘...Like a puppy,’ Weiss thought with a small smile, before exiting the tent and taking up watch.

Maybe Yang wasn’t as bad as Weiss made her out to be, sure, she was infuriating, but it was obvious she cared for Ruby and Blake, and oddly enough she had taken to Weiss quite quickly, despite the fact Weiss had been a bit rude. She was even willing to wake up shortly after her shift just to make breakfast for everyone.

‘Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all?’ Weiss thought to herself before concentrating on the task at hand. 

\---LineBreak---

“I can’t believe this,” Weiss muttered, chewing on a piece of meat from one of the rats Yang had caught. “This-this is actually good!”

“Well, what can I say?” Yang asked rhetorically with a shrug. “It’s an old family recipe-”

“Your family feeds on rats?” Weiss muttered, looking at Ruby, who only shrugged.

“Don’t look at me, we’re only half sisters.”

“And Yang’s mom was the crazy one,” Blake finished, slathering a bit more of her leftover tuna over her cooked rat.

“That explains so much,” Weiss nodded before looking up at Yang. “Thanks for the food.”

“No, thank you for not stealing back the tuna!” Yang laughed as she sat next to Weiss. “Blake would have been heartbroken if that can went up missing, would have been a real-”

“CATastrophe, yes, I get it, Yang, I’m like a cat,” Blake muttered, glaring at her friend.

“...” Yang said nothing as she lifted her finger and brought it close to Blake’s nose.

“...Stop it,” Blake demanded, swiping away Yang’s finger. Yang, however, refused to relent as she continued pointing at Blake, who in turn continued to bat away her finger. “Stop it!”

“Or what? With an attitude like that…” Yang paused, a shit eating grin on her face. “You’ll never purr-suade me to stop!”

“Snrk,” Weiss quickly covered her mouth, hoping no one heard that.

“Are you okay?” Ruby asked as she rushed to her side. “Here! Water! Don’t choke!” Thankfully, Ruby seemed to misinterpret her laugh.

“Whoa, Weiss, I know you like my rat, but don’t choke on it,” Yang joked, rubbing the girl’s back.

“R-right, thanks,” Weiss muttered, quelling down her amusement with the fresh water from Ruby. “And thank you, Ruby.”

“N-no problem,” Ruby muttered, blushing as she didn’t move away from Weiss’ side. “S-so! Uh, another ten minutes and I think we should move out!” Ruby said as she stood up, earning a bark of acknowledgment from Zwei.

“Move out?” Weiss muttered.

“Heck yeah!” Yang shouted as she punched the air. “The rate we’re going and with Weiss to help out, we’ll be there in no time!”

“Let’s just hope it hasn’t been overrun yet,” Blake muttered. “Who knows how many people had the same idea.”

“What idea?” Weiss asked, turning to Blake for answers. “Where are we going?”

“We, my beautiful guardian angel,” Ruby said as she wrapped her arm around Weiss’ shoulder. “Are going to the island of Patch!” she said as she pointed ahead.

“Yup,” Yang said, grabbing Ruby’s arm and slowly moving it until it was pointing in the right direction. “We’ve been in radio contact with our dad and uncle, and they’ve been doing a good job of keeping it safe.”

“There are still zombies,” Blake said as she got up and inspected her Glock. “But there are far fewer there, and if we work together we might be able to eliminate all of them, since there isn’t that many, to begin with.”

“Dad thinks that they’ve taken out about a quarter of the zombies, so with our help, we should be able to eliminate all of them!” Ruby finished enthusiastically, earning a nod from Weiss.

“That makes sense, Patch is a small island with a very small population…” Weiss muttered. If there could be a safe haven from the zombies, then Patch would make the most logical choice. “Survivors?”

“Small group including my dad, Uncle Qrow, and a few other people who apparently had the same idea,” Ruby said with a shrug. “Though if I knew this was going to happen, I never would have gone to Beacon Academy,” she muttered, surprising Weiss.

‘She went to Beacon?’ she thought to herself. That was one of the most prestigious colleges around, how did she-

“Anyway, you ready?” Ruby asked as she picked up what looked like a red rifle from some video game and hooked it to her back.

“Uh, yeah, of course,” Weiss said as she finished her meal and picked up her duffle bag. “Let’s get going to Patch!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you’re wondering, Ruby was majoring in mechanical engineering. If you think that means we’ll get to see “Her” then you’re right, in fact, it’ll be next chapter!


	4. Chapter 4

"How much longer until we make it to the docks, Blake?" Ruby asked after several hours of traveling. Blake looked back at the map and then at their surroundings.

"I'd say...another hour of travel at least."

"You sure about that, Blakey?" Yang asked, cupping her hands together and looking through them with one eye. "Cause if you want I could go up that building and peer out its location!" she joked, earning a groan from the group.

"Yang, can't you stop making puns for five minutes?" Blake begged, earning a laugh from Yang.

"I can't do that, Blakey, after all…" Yang trailed off, looking out to the distance. "...Uh, guys?" she whispered, pointing forward. "Is it just me, or is that a huge horde of zombies?"

"Please tell me that was just a horrible pun," Weiss said, hopeful as she looked at what Yang was pointing at. Sure enough, there was a large horde of zombies not too far from them, blocking their path to the docks. "...Dammit, Yang."

"Hey! Don't blame me, it's not my fault-"

"For once," Blake cut her off, earning a glare from Yang.

"That was just rude," Yang admonished. "What's wrong with you? Are you not feline fine?"

"For the last time, I am not a cat!" Blake whined, causing Yang to slap her knee with a laugh.

"Ha! I don't want to hear that from someone who loves to sleep in boxes!"

"That was one time, Yang! One time!"

"Uh, guys?" Ruby called out, poking both Yang and Blake with her fingers. "I hate to break up your play fighting, but...um, it's kinda causing a bit of trouble-"

"Oh, for Oum's sake, They're coming after us!" Weiss screamed as she picked up Zwei and grabbed Ruby by the scruff of her neck. "Now move it!"

"Right behind ya, Weiss!" Yang called out, looking at the incoming horde and shrugging, going into a light jog to keep up with Weiss. The horde was slow, it would be easy to outrun them.

"Just so we're clear on things, this is Yang's fault," Blake said, earning a glare from Yang.

"Oh, that is just not-"

"Agreed."

"I agree with Weiss!" Ruby said as she shot her hand up into the air, not caring about the hurt look Yang was now sporting.

"Wow, Ruby, that's just...wow," Yang muttered, looking much like a kicked puppy. "You've known Weiss for, what, two days?"

"Well, yeah, but I also know everything about her," Ruby replied, gazing lovingly at the girl next to her.

"Yeah, that's not creepy at all," Weiss sighed, taking a chance look behind themselves. "Did we outrun them?" she asked, slowing to a stop as she saw no zombies on their trail.

"Huh, looks like-Look out!" Ruby shouted as she pulled Weiss away.

"Wha-what?!" Weiss said as she turned around, pulling her sword out. "Where is it? Where's the-"

"You almost stepped in dog poo," Ruby muttered, looking at the spot Weiss was uncomfortably close too.

"...Thanks," Weiss muttered, unsure how to feel. Sure, Ruby had almost given her a heart attack over dog poo, but on the other hand, she really didn't want to step in dog poo. Thinking it over, Weiss decided on the latter as she looked back at Ruby, who was looking at her with big, shiny eyes. "...Good girl," she mumbled, petting Ruby on the head.

"Yeah, no problem, Weiss!" Ruby said ecstatically, leaning into Weiss' hand, wanting to fully enjoy this blissful moment. She couldn't help but sigh in contentment, the girl of her dreams was touching her in ways she never imagined! 'I'm never washing my hair again!'

"Aw, how cute!" Yang said, framing the two with her hands. "If only my scroll were still working, I'd take a picture of this beautiful-"

"Gragh!" the four looked behind themselves, spotting several zombies shuffling towards them.

"Crap!" Blake cursed, taking her Glock out attempting to aim, only for Weiss to throw her arm in front of her.

"Don't, you'll only attract more!" she said, pulling Myrtenaster out. "I'll handle-"

"I'll handle this!" Ruby almost shouted, pulling out her weird anime gun and posing dramatically. "Don't worry, Weiss, your knight in black and red will protect you!"

"You idiot, I just said guns will just attract-"

"Come, Crescent Rose!" Ruby shouted, her anime gun extending forward into a pole like shape, before a crescent blade popped out of the end.

"...What?" Weiss mumbled, not believing what she was seeing.

"Wac'cha!" Ruby screamed, slicing at the small group of zombies that somehow kept up with them, decapitating them in one smooth movement. "Aw yeah!" Ruby gloated with a fist pump, having dispatching the zombies easily.

"...It really is an anime gun," Weiss mumbled, unsure how else to react.

"And that's why I don't really worry about zombies," Yang said with a shrug. "Ruby's good enough to take out an entire horde with that monster of hers!"

"Monster?!" Ruby shouted, turning towards Yang with a glare. "Don't you ever refer to my baby like that!" Ruby ordered, turning Crescent Rose back into gun form. "Oh, don't be sad, baby. Mean ol' Yang didn't mean it, she didn't mean it," she purred, rubbing her gun affectionately.

"...Why is it always the weird ones?" Weiss asked herself, hoping Ruby wouldn't become as obsessed with her as she was with Crescent Rose. 'Though maybe that wouldn't be so bad?' she thought, imagining what it would be like to have Ruby's face rubbing against her own, before shaking away the perverse thoughts. 'Damn, why does she do this to me?' she thought turning away only to find Blake staring at her.

"...Pervert," Blake whispered, causing Weiss to blush.

"Oh, shut up," Weiss whispered back, before turning back to Ruby. "So, since the pier is covered by zombies, how are we going to get a boat now?"

"Hmm," Ruby mumbled, rubbing her chin in thought. "How about...we swim?" she asked, earning a glare from Weiss.

"...I don't suppose you have any ideas, Yang?"

What about...we steal a kayak at that store," she said, pointing at a nearby sports store. "We take it about a mile off the docks, and slowly make our way to the boats that way?"

"...That might work," Weiss muttered, surprised at Yang's idea. It was true zombies couldn't swim, they would just sink like stones, making it unlikely for them to upturn their boat.

"Our best bets a speed boat, or maybe a small yacht, instead of a larger boat," Yang continued on, talking more to herself than anyone else. "If we get too big of a boat then we'd have to worry about zombies hidden away…" Everyone nodded in agreement, Vale was a good sized city, there was a good chance they could find what they were looking for at the docks.

"But what happens if there are no boats out?" Ruby asked.

"It'll be fine," Weiss said, putting a comforting hand on Ruby's shoulder. "Even if that were the case, there's bound to be a place that rents out boats, it'll be a bit of a pain to get the boat out of there, and then after that-"

"It'll be clear sailings!"

"...After that, we'll have to worry about getting fuel."

"Uh, guys. Clear sailings? Cause, you know, that means things will be easier, and you sail boats..."

"But given that it'll be a boat rental shop," Weiss continued, ignoring Yang's terrible, yet oddly enjoyable, puns. "There should be leftover fuel we can use, so we should be fine there…" Weiss trailed off, thinking over the plan once more. "But even then, there are so many uncertainties. What if someone had the same idea already? What if someone stole the fuel to use for their car? There are so many what if's that our chances of success are rather low-"

"Boring!" Yang interrupted, making her way to the sports shop. "Either way this is our best shot, so might as well take it!"

"I'm trying to say that we should make a backup plan, not that the plan is a bad one!" Weiss shot back, withholding the urge to flip Yang off.

"Agreed," Blake said with a nod. "If things do go south we'll need a proper plan to make sure we all get out alive."

"We do have a backup plan," Yang said as she turned around, pointing at Ruby. "If all else fails, Ruby kills the zombies with that monster of hers!"

"She's not a monster!" Ruby glared, taking Weiss by the hand and following after Yang.

"Yeah, yeah, sure she isn't," Yang chuckled as she entered the sports shop, looking for the perfect kayak, ignoring the scathing glare she was receiving from Ruby.

"...I wonder if it'll be alright to go fishing on the boat?" Blake muttered, looking at the fishing rods and bait that lined the walls. It would be handy for catching their own food...


	5. Chapter 5

“Ruby, would you move your foot already!” Weiss demanded, trying to push away the offending limb from her lower back. 

“I-I can’t! Yang’s taking up too much room!” Ruby replied, her body practically collapsed upon itself as Yang leaned down over her.

“Can’t help it, Blake’s using my back to hold up the tackle box,” she grunted, her arms straight out from her sides in the shape of an airplane, one slowly rowing and the other holding up Zwei.

“Can’t you fish later, Blake?!” Weiss asked, trying in vain to help Yang row. The pain in her back was just too much to bear.

“I want to eat all the fishes,” Blake whispered, a silent mantra as she gazed out into the open sea, waiting for the fishes to take the bait, a gummy worm Ruby had found on the ground and tried and failed to eat due to Weiss slapping it out of her mouth.

“Err, that could have been my gummy worm,” Ruby whined, before being struck by an idea. “Oh, I know!” she said, spreading her legs and wrapping them around Weiss’ waist before wrapping her arms around Weiss’ torso. “How’s this?”

“Much better,” Weiss sighed, much preferring the feeling of Ruby’s...assets over her combat boots. It was like being massaged by a big cup of jello, much to her joy.

“Yeah, I bet,” Yang giggled, leaning more of her weight on Ruby. “Damn, I really wish we found a bigger kayak…”

“Wouldn’t be so bad if Blake didn’t bring the biggest tackle box and cooler she could find,” Weiss said as loud as she could, peeking behind her to cast a glare at Blake.

“I want all the fishies,” Blake whispered back as if she couldn’t register the others complaints, much to Weiss’ annoyance.

“Of course you do,” Weiss sighed, resigning herself to her fate of feeling Ruby’s assets upon her back. Not the worse thing that could happen, but she’d rather have more room to enjoy the current situation. “I swear if we don’t find a good sized boat I am going to-”

“Hey, Wess! Knock knock!” Yang interrupted, evoking a sigh from Weiss.

“Who’s there?”

“Old lady!”

“Old lady who?”

“Oh, I didn’t know you could yodel!” Yang laughed, earning a groan from Weiss.

“Oh, I love Weiss’ yodeling!” Ruby giggled, earning a look of shock from both Weiss and Yang.

“Wait, she actually yodels?!”

“You know about that?!”

“Of course she does, and of course I do!” Ruby said ecstatically, rubbing a hand on Weiss’ cheek. “I did say I knew everything about you, didn’t I?” she whispered, sending a shiver down both Weiss’ and Yang’s spines.

“Uh, right,” Yang muttered, casting a worried look towards Weiss. “Hey, you gonna be alright?”

“It’s fine,” Weiss said with a shrug. “Ruby’s nice enough that I can ignore her creepy, stalker personality.” 

“Aww, thanks, Weiss!” Ruby said as she rubbed her cheek against Weiss’, causing the white haired beauty to smile.

“No problem, Ruby.” ‘It also helps that you’re more adorable and cuddly than a thousand puppies combined,’ she thought to herself, keeping that little tidbit to herself.

“I want all the fishies.”

“So...about the yodeling-”

“It was five years ago, in the distant lands of Vacuo,” Ruby began, her eyes losing all of its luster, as if she were in a trance. “Another child prodigy by the name of Coco Adel challenged Weiss to the one form of singing she had no experience in, yodeling-”

“I really don’t want to re-live that experience,” Weiss interrupted.

“Why, did you lose?”

“No, I won,” Weiss said, glaring at nothing in particular. “It’s just I won the stupidest prize ever-”

“A trumpet encrusted with diamonds,” Ruby growled, blowing into her hands as if it were a trumpet. “It was pretty gaudy looking, not even worthy of touching Weiss’ perfect, succulent lips.”

“...Right,” Yang mumbled, deciding to drop the subject and instead check up on Blake. “Catch any fishes yet?”

“I want all the fishies.”

“Of course not,” Yang mumbled, irritation beginning to set in despite herself. Blake had finally gone off the wall in her search for fish, while Ruby, being in such close proximity to her idol in this cramped kayak, was quickly losing any and all reservations. Yang was beginning to fear that Ruby would lose all reason and take Weiss then and there.

‘That’s not something I want to see right now,’ Yang thought to herself, attempting to paddle faster than ever before. They really needed to get to those yachts soon.

After what felt like forever, and more than a few times of Weiss yelling at Ruby for wandering hands, the four girls had finally circumvented the horde of zombies and made it onto the shore.

“Alright gang, let’s split up and find our dream-”

“There’s one, and another, and over there, and over there-” Ruby interrupted, pointing out each and every boat.

“Seems like we have quite the selection,” Weiss nodded, looking over each boat, marking in her head which ones seemed both large and sturdy enough. “Come on, Ruby, I think I see a suitable one,” Weiss commanded.

“Okay, Weiss!” Ruby said as she took Weiss by the hand and lead her away, the duo ignoring Yang completely.

“...Well, that’s just rude,” she muttered to herself, deciding to just shrug it off and follow after the two, Zwei hot on her heels.

“...I didn’t catch any fishies,” Blake sighed, hooking her fishing line so it wouldn’t sway in the wind and followed after the others.

Back with Weiss and Ruby, the two were going over several boats, Weiss pointing to each one and Ruby denying each one.

“How about this one?” Weiss pointed for the eighth time, Ruby walking up to said boat and examining it inside and out.

“...It’s salvageable, Yang, keep watch over this one, we’re going to check the others to see if we can find one in better shape!” Ruby commanded, walking off with Weiss before Yang could even answer. “...This isn’t good, Weiss,” Ruby whispered, catching Weiss off guard. “A lot of these boats are in poor shape, and even if that last one’s salvageable, I don’t know if I can fix it with the limited tools I have.”

Weiss quietly mulled over Ruby’s words, looking back at the other boats that were not to Ruby’s standards before finally turning back with a thought. “Can’t you salvage parts from the other boats?” Ruby sighed at that, head drooping just a bit.

“Soft maybe, some of these boats have similar parts that could work, but they don’t look up to task,” she shrugged, pausing for a moment. As soon as Weiss began to worry for the small girl, Ruby looked her in the eye and smiled, placing her hands protectively over Weiss’ shoulders. “Sorry, I’m being a butt. I’m sure I can make this work, even if I have to do a bit of jury rigging!” she laughed, taking Weiss by the hand once again to look over several more boats, being careful not to stray too far from Yang and Blake.

Several hours passed like this, Ruby examining any and all boats and stripping them of any parts they may be able to use, Weiss going back and forth between her and Yang, dropping off anything she could carry herself. Yang continued to stand guard, climbing to the highest point of the boat in search of wayward zombies, and Blake had taken it upon herself to gather their dinner for the night.

“I finally got the fishies,” Blake mumbled, putting a stick through each of her ten fishes and sticking them into the ground next to a blazing fire. “I call dibs on the three biggest!”

“That’s fine, I’ll just have...these two,” Weiss pointed at the two smallest before opening her duffel bag and pulling out her box of crackers and setting them off to the side.

“That leaves two for me, two for Ruby, and one for Zwei,” Yang counted, a yip of agreement coming from Zwei.

“No thanks, I’m good!” Ruby called out, wrench in hand as she loomed over the boat’s engine. “This is going to take all night, I don’t really have time to eat.” 

“What do you mean you don’t have time?” Weiss scolded, standing up and walking over to Ruby. 

“Well… you know, the faster I get this boat up and running-”

“Yes, and starving yourself, therefore depriving yourself of energy which will make you work slower, is going to be oh so helpful,” Weiss said sarcastically, causing Ruby to wince. “You want to work on that boat all night? Be my guest, but you’re going to eat,” Weiss growled, aggressively poking Ruby’s chest, daring the girl to argue with her.

“...Yes ma’am,” Ruby muttered, nodding her head in agreement. 

“...Good,” Weiss mumbled with a nod and walked back to the campfire. “I’ll let you know when the foods ready, do you want peanut butter on your crackers?”

“Aw, that sounds amazing, actually,” Ruby smiled, a bit of drool escaping from her lips, turning back to the engine and rummaging through it. “Make sure you give Zwei some!”

“Arf!” Zwei barked in agreement, wagging his tail as he went to sit by Weiss, whining as he pawed at her.

“Okay, you adorable big baby,” she cooed, grabbing a plastic spoonful of peanut butter and spreading it on a cracker. “How about you two?” she asked, tossing the cracker at Zwei, who missed entirely, smudging his nose in it.

“Yeah, I’ll have a couple, thanks!”

“Hmm?” Blake mumbled, eating one of her fish raw. “Irm gerd, danks.”

“...Disgusting,” Weiss muttered, handing Yang five peanut butter crackers. “Share with Zwei,” she said as she got up, two crackers in hand, and walked over to Ruby.

“What’s up?” Ruby asked, not bothering to turn towards Weiss. “The fish aren’t done already, are they?”

“No, I just thought I’d get you something to tide you over,” Weiss replied, leaning over Ruby and placing the cracker against her lips, earning a smile.”

“Thanks,” she muttered, taking the cracker in her mouth and gobbling it up, never taking her eyes off of her work.

“No problem,” Weiss shrugged, waiting for Ruby to swallow before feeding her the other cracker. ‘She really is diligent, isn’t she?’ Weiss thought to herself, watching Ruby hard at work on the boat. She had thought of Ruby as nothing more than company this whole time, albeit an attractive one that could cause her to swoon, but it was only a physical attraction. But watching Ruby take down those zombies with her bizarre anime gun and fixing this boat up all by herself made Weiss feel something for Ruby she never thought she would feel.

Respect. Respect was what Weiss was feeling for the girl right now. The way she focused all of her efforts on fixing the boat as soon as possible so the group didn’t have to stay here any longer, the way she fearlessly faced those zombies…

‘I really shouldn’t be surprised,’ Weiss thought, remembering how when they first met that Ruby was willing to sacrifice herself in order to protect Zwei. The girl was the kind of person to put everyone else’s protection ahead of her own, and while that allowed Weiss to feel comfortable with allowing Ruby to watch her back, that did raise its own concerns. What if, with Ruby’s self-sacrificing nature, she got herself killed? 

Given the reality of their situation, it wouldn’t surprise Weiss if Ruby did get herself killed, whether protecting her small, somewhat incompetent group to protecting random strangers that Ruby would perceive to be friendly, all the same, the very idea scared her. Each day that passed by Weiss felt herself growing more and more attached to the younger girl. It wasn’t love, but…

‘...It’s getting to that point,’ Weiss thought, accepting her feelings for the younger girl. Whether or not she was falling for Ruby or if it was simply desperation for a companion, Weiss had made up her mind. If Ruby was going to be so foolish as to endanger herself for the sake of others, then Weiss would have to be sure to be there by her side, to make sure it would never get to that point.

Or at the very least, be there to pull Ruby’s ass out of the fire.

\---LineBreak---

“All aboard!” Yang shouted, her hands cupped over her mouth. “The SS Getting Our Asses Outta Here is about to disembark, everyone keep your hands inside the boat at all times! Now-” Yang paused, her patented shit eating grin on her face. “Water we waiting for?!”

“Haha, good one,” Weiss said sarcastically, though she filed away that pun into the back of her mind. ‘Damn, that was a good one.’

“Best one yet, Sis,” Ruby said as laid next to Weiss, stifling a yawn. “Wake me when we get there?” she asked, her head resting on Weiss’ lap.

“Of course. You just sleep till we get there, you deserve it,” Weiss said with a smile on her face, her hands running through Ruby’s hair. 

“You guys are no fun,” Yang muttered as she took the wheel. “With this baby’s speed, we’ll be in Patch in two hours, tops!”

“More like four,” Blake corrected, casting her fishing line into the water. “Fine by me, gives me more time to fish.” ‘And maybe I’ll snag me a tuna!’ she thought excitedly, drool dripping from her tiny smile.

“...What a crew we have, right, Zwei,” Weiss whispered, watching as the corgi settled next to her with a yawn, eliciting a giggle from her. “Yup, quite the crew,” she whispered to herself, and though she was uncertain about what the future held for the four of them, she was confident that they could handle anything that came their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is a good way to end this story. I’m actually rather happy with this, despite it being a bit anticlimactic it just feels... right to me. I’d rather end it like this than to have Ruby, Weiss, Blake, Yang, Taiyang, Qrow, and Team JNPR closing off Taiyang’s house and fending off zombies in a bloody mess of a poor attempt at an action scene, ending in Ruby kissing Weiss as they’re covered in blood. Weiss hates this but appreciates the gesture. 
> 
> Yeah, that was the original ending, but like I said, I couldn’t get a working action scene. Though future stories will also be comedies like this one, it might be a good idea to add in action scenes so I can get a feel for them.


End file.
